New Swears
Funny Isn't Real LP
Catalog Number BR-65

Right after they came back from OTTAWA EXPLOSION! weekend 2013, THE KIDNAPPERS told us about this fantastic band called NEW SWEARS. Four guys living toghether in a house with practice room, wild stage antics, great melodic garage punk dancing tunes, well this all reminded me of Die Slaughterhaus circa 2005...

NEW SWEARS have just released this album in the USA and Canada, here is the limited european pressing of this 10 track party album that should smooth the way for these dudes to hop over to our shores and present their live show all over europe, somewhen early 2014.

Imagine MEAN JEANS partying with the BLACK LIPS! Jangly garage punk from these Ottawa party animals. The perfect soundtrack to getting drunk and jumping off the roof of a two story house into the shallow end and having to be carted off to the emergency room for a couple broken bones.

„New Swears are one of the awesome new crop of crazy good bands popping up in Ottawa. That’s right, while you were sleeping, yawnsville capital city became a fierce hotbed of rad garage and allsorts bands with a thriving DIY venue network to boot. Sporting two former members of The Polymorphines , New Swears are a joyful and wasted party, and this tape is brimming with feel-good tambo shakers and guitar hooks. Surfy, with punk hooks and smilyfaced locals exploding with danger, fun, youth with just a small tinge of sadness. These dudes crap out catchy riffs like golden eggs, everything is light, uptempo and catchy as shit.” (The Big Takeover, July 2013)

Nick No-fun
Beej Eh
Sammy J Scorpion


Side A
1. Jon‘s Coke
2. Good Girls
3. Pig Farm
4. Paradise (video)
5. Cerveza

Side B
1. Rather Be Dead
2. Liquor Store
3. Burning Man
4. See you in Hull (video)
5. Two Darts (video)

Limited to 300 copies, black wax, with a printed insert.

This record is also out on vinyl (Dirt Cult Records), Cassette (Bruised Tongue Records).

"Boy do I love it when an album's cover accurately describes the music inside. It's a collage of people in various states of partying. Beer, wounds, cross dressing, and an entire can of cranberry sauce being poured lovingly on a man's chest. The pictures are cutout and pasted together in a haphazard manner which screams loudly "We're not professionals! Try this at home!" Now imagine this aesthetic to garage punk in the vein of acts like Black Lips and Hunx And His Punx with the production values of a Dirtnap band. In short, fantastic. One of the best records of the year, no doubt. Put this sucker on and there's a party immediately. Like, it just forms around the record. Grade: A."

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